Sunday Sermons
Kindness
Kindness
Put it On
I find it interesting the language that the Holy Spirit used when addressing the need to develop various attributes in our lives as Christians:
- “So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience” (Colossians 3:12).
- “And put on the new self….be kind to one another” (Ephesians 4:24; 32).
The phrase “put on” carries the idea of clothing oneself. It is as if Paul is saying, “When you wake up each morning remember to get dressed spiritually and emotionally as well as physically”. Or, when we wake up each morning we need to be wise about the attitude that we select to wear for the day. It probably would be a good idea to contemplate in the morning, “What kind of attitude am I going to wear today?” Observe that kindness, as well as all the other attitudes and behaviors in this section are choices that we make.
Kindness
Has been described as love in action. It is not something merely emotional, rather, it is practical, visible and active. I have been told that there is a song that says, “Find the need and fill it. Find the hurt and heal it”. That seems to be a good description of kindness. Thus the command is not to merely feel like being kind, put to actively be kind (Ephesians 4:32).
Motivation
“But why should we be kind? After all, kindness can be risky. We might be misunderstood if we are kind to others. They might think, ‘Why is this person being so nice?’ What is in it for him?’ People we are kind to also might take advantage of us” (God’s Power to Change Your Life, Rick Warren p. 120). Yet God faced even far more risks of being kind. A couple people may take advantage of our kindness, but billions have taken advantage of God’s continual kindness, yet He was still kind to mankind. If we are tempted to stop being kind because someone might abuse our kindness, ask yourself, “Do you want God having the same attitude?” Do you want God withholding His kindness to you because of what others are doing or not doing? The poet Robert Burns said that the kind heart most resembles God. We should be kind because God has been so kind to us. On a daily basis we continually benefit from His kindness.
- “But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared” (Titus 3:4).
- “He might show the surpassing riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus” (Ephesians 2:7).
The Need for Kindness in the World
In a world where men and women can be lovers of self, arrogant, ungrateful to parents, gossips, unreasonable, and brutal (2 Timothy 3:2-4) kindness will always been greatly needed and appreciated. We tend to forget that many of the people that we will encounter on a weekly basis have been at the receiving end of such evil. They may have been raised by very selfish parents, or work for someone who is very unreasonable. Kindness will be like a breath of fresh air to them. In addition, Solomon exhorted his son, “Do not let kindness and truth leave you, bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart” (Proverbs 3:3). The idea is that loving the truth and being kind are two indispensable qualities.
Kindness is Good For Me
We do personally benefit when we are kind and I am not merely talking about that people will tend to be nice to us if we are nice to them.
- “He who pursues righteousness and loyalty finds life, righteousness and honor” (Proverbs 21:21).
- “The merciful man does himself good, but the cruel man does himself harm” (Proverbs 11:17).
The Elements of Kindness
- Sensitivity
People who are practicing kindness are aware of the needs of those around them. “Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4). Underline the phrase “look out”. Kindness starts with getting my mind off myself and my problems and noticing what others are experiencing.
“Often in marriage we are totally unaware of what our partner’s needs are. We have become calloused. We have stopped listening. We are oblivious to the pressure our mate is under. Simply stated, the root of many marriage problems is insensitivity” (Warren pp. 121-122).
- Be Supportive
Especially, we need to be supportive with our words. One of the first places to put kindness into action is in our speech:
- “A soothing tongue is a tree of life, but perversion in it crushes the spirit” (Proverbs 15:4).
- “The lips of the righteous bring forth what is acceptable” (Proverbs 10:32).
- “But the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18).
- “And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue” (Proverbs 31:27).
When we realize how kind God has been to us, and how fortunate we are to be alive and saved, it is easier to be kind with our words. When a person is not aware of their blessings it is far easier to be cutting, hurtful with words and always running other people down.
- Sympathy
I know that we often feel unqualified to help people who are hurting and that such situations may seem awkward to us, but they probably seem awkward at times to most people. Yet kindness can express itself not only verbally to also in a touch on the shoulder, a pat on the back, or a gasp of the hand. Paul said that the one of the qualities of someone who is the Lord’s servant is that they are kind to all (2 Timothy 2:24). What this means is that people who are spiritual take time for those who are hurting or struggling.
- Straightforward
Sometimes kindness realizes that there is the need to be frank or candid. Telling someone the truth, laying it on the line or leveling with people is also a demonstration of kindness. Solomon noted, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend” (Proverbs 27:6). Paul told the Galatians, “So have I become your enemy by telling you the truth” (Galatians 4:16). There are times to tell someone, “You are ruining your marriage” or “You are about to make a big mistake”. Kindness really cares. “Sometimes I want to ask couples in counseling when they are going to care enough and get mad and say, ‘I want our marriage to work, and I’m not going to put up with this mess!’” (Warren pp. 129-130). Observe, “Being straightforward does not mean offering a ‘hit-and-run’ type of comment. Kindness will speak up when necessary but kindness will equally stick around and help this person change.
- Be Spontaneous
There are times we can plan kindness and there will be times that the opportunity to be kind simply arrives without any planning on our part (The Good Samaritan). Flexibility is a must. In addition, now the is the time (Galatians 6:10). Do not put off the opportunity to say a kind thing, write a kind note or express kindness. A common enemy of kindness is busyness.
The Past Makes It Difficult to be Kind?
I don’t believe that such an excuse will fly with God. Joseph had a very difficult past and yet he was kind (Genesis 50:19-21).
Mark Dunagan | mdunagan@frontier.net
Beaverton Church of Christ | 503-644-9017
www.beavertonchurchofchrist.net
